The art of pleasuring one's partner has been discussed in great detail throughout this website. Combining these experiences can result in a geometric progression over each individual technique.
Creating the proper space is essential to achieving the most perfect result: As with most other tantric techniques it’s best performed on a stable and firm surface. While a bed is generally too soft, a yoga or exercise mat (large enough for two) will work quite well. The room itself should be comfortably warm (when naked) and draft free. A few candles will serve nicely for the purpose of intimate illumination. A pre-programmed selection of inspirational mood music will help to complete the atmosphere. A dish of high quality massage oil (or two individual dispensers) should be within easy reach, as well as two latex gloves and jellied water based lubricant.
Seating Positions: There are a variety of ways the couple may decide to sit. Regardless of your choice there are two considerations of equal importance in making that decision: comfort and easy accessibility. Since you can expect to remain in the selected position for more than a short length of time, you must be certain that the position is not awkward for you. This may take some experimentation in the beginning. Just as important as comfort will be an easy accessibility to your partners body, particularly the genital area.
One position which perhaps offers the best compromise, is to sit cross legged from one another. If desirable one partner may use the back of a couch or wall to support their back. You may use flat firm pillows to sit on (in addition to the floor mat) and to help support your back. Remember, comfort is essential to achieving the perfect experience!
Beginning the massage: It's usually best for one partner to begin by stroking the other, after which the roles are reversed. During this early phase the sensual massage should be limited in its intensity, with no more than incidental contact to the genitals. The primary purpose is togradually elevate the feeling of desire and excitement within each partner. The couple should spend at least 10 – 15 minutes stroking one another is this manner.
After the couple becomes sufficiently aroused (warmed up), each partner will now begin to shift their focus onto the genital area of the other. If for example the female is the giver she will begin to perform lingam massage on her partner. If the male is the giver he will perform yoni massage. [Same sex couples would be performing either mutual yoni or lingam massage].
While pleasuring one another the couple should attempt to make as much eye contact with one another as possible. This may be difficult as each partner may be distracted by the erotic vision of their own, as well as their partner's genitals being stimulated.
Although it may not seem fair, but the female will need to assume responsibility for her male partners level of excitement (ejaculation control). It is essential that she not wait for her partner to make it known verbally that he is about to climax. The female does not have the same problem as she is free to orgasm as many times as she likes.
The ultimate experience: Those who seek a yet higher level of excitement and unique pleasure, may consider simultaneous anal and lingam/yoni massage.
Momentarily stopping mutual massage, each member will slip on one latex glove (which should already be within reach). Jellied lubricant should now be generously applied to the index or middle finger of each gloved hand. It's desirable that each partner begins to simultaneously rub, and gently probe the other's anus. The couple should continue to maintain eye contact with one another.
The emotional sensation, as well as physical impact of this experience is nothing short of profound. The very idea and new found sensation, of fondling one another’s anal opening is quite indescribable. It may take time and patience, but even a reluctant sphincter will allow a loving probing finger to enter. The anus may exhibit the somewhat schizophrenic tendency of pulling and pushing the intruding finger, all at the same time. Not certain of embarrassing or rejecting it. In time the finger will be “allowed” to enter. After this happens do not begin pull it in and out, but only feel your way around this new environment. The female partner should be crooking her finger in order to contact her partner's prostate, using the pad of her finger to gently massage the protruding surface.
Begin to resume mutual genital massage. Each partner will vividly notice the other's anal contractions. When thefemale senses the male's impending climax, she may simply reduce stimulation to the lingam (while pressuring the prostate with her inserted finger). Alternatively, she may allow the male reach his climax, with a possibility of timing the event with her own orgasm. The result will be more intense than anything the couple has ever experienced.